Oh, the coals? Bro, I totally feel you on that. Housing woes? Bro, I totally feel that. The fuckus stocks? Broseph, I feel your pain. These are indeed trying times.

Last night was my girl [space] friend’s 21st birthday, so me and all her friends (blond street warriors with little shame and a penchant for debauchery) shot down several white rhinos at a variety of local saloons.

A white rhino is patron silver shaken with ice. It’s a very masterful drink. No chaser required. As a point in fact, if you chase this drink, you are a pussy.

I also like ordering it because it gives me the opportunity to be obnoxious/friendly/flirty/hilarious. Clearly, I’m only friendly, flirty or hilarious with bartenderesses. The bartenders, hah, they get the full brunt of a liquored up Danny surrounded by hoes that need to get they drink on.

“5 white rhinos, please”

[blank stare]

5 dude.

“What’s a white rhino?’

Since I told the group that he wouldn’t know what it was, because technically it’s made up, we all start laughing at this poor s.o.b. as we revel in our own merriment.

“You don’t know what a WR is? [shaking head bemused and with second-hand embarassment]. What bartending school did you go to? It’s a classic. Is there another…you know what, fuck it, it’s Patron silver shaken with ice. You gonna top us off since you didn’t know what it was?”

“So you want patron silver, shaken, with ice.”

“No I want 5 white rhinos.”

Anyway, after imbibing a fair number of the white rhinos, I got to thinking about stocks and the economy.

Obviously that is a total lie, I was thinking about boobs and the girls legs I was talking to. But distantly, far off in the recesses, I was thinking about stocks.

I realized they really are for asshats. Most stocks just suck balls. It’s all roses when they go higher, but man, watch out, should they ever trade lower, it’s all fire and brimstone. Plus, we’re basically all in the same momentum stocks anyway.

The odds of catching the next Microsoft is nil. I’m sure millionz of people were shook out of MSFT when they were up XYZ%, but were using a stop loss. Or there was that inevitable something that prevented them from getting to the “I turned 20k into 50m” part of the equation.

Using stocks as a means to strike it rich is just plain asinine. It should come as no surprise that it’s how most view the market. I mean, to think that some Joe can come and just print money with no strategy, no experience, no losses, no struggle is just wrong. Making money in the market requires discipline and work.

The Fly is up 55% YTD. Guess how many hours that guy has slept YTD? 55.

Retail stocks come and go with the fads.

Biotech is like playing catch with live grenades, as The Fly often says.

Industrials are tied to the economy and are capital intensive.

Financials blow.

On and on.

The only thing that works, and, listen to me very quietly (another great Flyism) is growth.

The only way to consistently outperform is to buy what consistently works. That is growth. Then diversify growth among various stocks and sectors. That’s what I do, generally speaking.

But blue chips? C’mon. They aren’t growing. All these old, staid companies? Not for me.

I don’t know what decisions people make when they buy a stock like Ford or GM. Just because it’s there doesn’t mean you have to buy it. I don’t get how there is even a market for these things. Who is out there accumulating Ford? Who?

All in all, selling stock short right now is easy, until it isn’t.

WYNN? You see that dangler hit low 70s this morning?

Regional Banks? Noice.

DE? Covered that short too soon.

How about HAR?

I watched the Don Harrold video, the Mr. Mortgages.  It got me a little down, thinking about the wealth destruction that’s going on out there.

Oh, and have a happy 4th everyone.

That’s not the way to think about it though. Not at all. You have to be positive in your own life, especially if you want to laugh at the tomfoolery of others. In that vein, I hope everyone spends some time with their families. Maybe throw a few white rhinos in there, and definitely, find some girls to enjoy them with.

America is kickass and I love it. Anyone who serves or makes America better, tomorrow is your day. Celebrate it.

*Except for the police, who I dislike.