Why should I willingly reveal my paucity in trading knowledge? How could I or anyone approach the nearly non-gayness stature of the Fly in this regard? Instead, I will proceed to dismantle The Fly’s literary blogging style via the tremendously inane and boring tool of Post Modernist Deconstruction and with a little help from chick bickering–better known as bitching–thrown in for good measure.

A colleague at a British division of Autodesk–where I had the delightful opportunity to observe first hand the asshatted idiocy of corporate bureaucracy–once admonished me for enjoying Mr. Bean. How dare I poke fun at thick people. And many, OK, not too many, but there are some here and there, ask, how dare the Fly poke (look up double entendre, you fools) fun at gay people?

I will first deconstruct Mr. Bean. The blindingly brilliant conclusion will then be transferred via osmosis to the thorny dilemma of the Fly’s literary blogging style resulting in absolute understanding of my points.

In the opening segment of each of Mr. Bean’s episodes, a spotlight hovers on a cobblestoned pavement, and then suddenly, Mr. Bean is hurled into the spotlight in a prone and bewildered manner. The sense one is given is that Mr. Bean is an alien, thrust into the welling seas of humanity. So, Mr. Bean is not thick but alien, alien to what is basic human sense. However, the truth is that Mr. Bean is more human than human. To focus on the inane and pathetic aspects of Bean’s glaringly obvious humanity is to drive the point home, that humans are fools.

Instant Osmosis (a close cousin to instant oatmeal): Human=gay=fools.

Am I saying that the Fly is the least human among us? No, he is only aware of the gayness of others because he has first hand knowledge of his own. This grasp of innate foolishness residing in humanity fuels The Fly’s righteousness–he can lash out and label others as gay because he knows what he speaks of and he is not shy in this regard, speaking the truth, a truth that no one really wants to hear. So, he blasts it out in an admirably snarky style.

AND CLEAN OUT YOUR MAMMOTH GUMMY USED OATMEAL BOWLS YOURSELF, YOU DICKHEAD!

(I have fulfilled my goals as stated in the first paragraph of this post except for the chick bickering, so the last sentence fulfills that.)