We’ve been quite engaged at the Bilderberg Eastern European Estate. As part of the dissolution of the Warsaw pact, Mr. Bilderberg agreed to keep a small armed force of 200,000 mercenaries throughout the Balkans. Bang to rights, many of the buggers in the region have tested Mr. Bilderberg’s mettle and have been duly dispatched, without honour.

I see many of you barmaids have been busy sponging up the leftovers of U.S. banking institutions, who orchestrated this bull market, with the advised permission from Mr. Bilderberg and associates, just so that they could reliquify their current accounts and operate with solvency.

After we liquidated Bear Stearns, the barristers have been running amok, trying to identify the source of information and selling power.

We’ve been in detailed discussions to buy 200 tonnes of gold bullion from an unnamed South African mine. Moreover, it is in Mr. Bilderberg’s best interest to increase his gold position to over 1.2 trillion euros.

As of now, our charwallahs have been busy with the cafetière. Mr. Bilderberg is hosting Henry Paulson for a quick cup of our finest bean.

And I quote: “Hanky, you’ve had enough upside. Now go fetch me a glass of Burgundy”.

From this I deduce Mr. Bilderberg will rapidly pull the rugs from underneath you nosy parkers.

Listen to me now, very closely and quietly, sell short all available shares of [[MOS]], as if a dog were biting your bumph.

Good Day

Rag