Not surprisingly, it has been a very busy (and very profitable) month for your idol. Without going into details, let me just say that I made a killing by fostering human rights violations in some of the more, how shall I say, politically turbulent nations of this “prison planet”.

But enough about me. Tonite, we recognize the efforts of “mrkcbill” by awarding him iBC’s highest civilian honour, “Peanut of the Month”.

Undoubtedly, I’m sure that many of you would like to protest this, since he did not, as a point in fact, have the highest score. To you I say, “Throw yourself off the nearest idle balcony, lest I dispatch Rag’s “spirit guide” to extinguish your soul with the horrible truths of Vishnu”. Indeed.

So, if mrkcbill’s score does not merit this honour, how can I justify giving it to him? As a point in fact, I justify giving it to him because he pledged his family’s life to one of my masonic lodges. It’s as simple–and beautiful–as that. If you desire to find similar favour from Bilderberg, you may follow his example. All that I require is a notarized statement that proclaims the unconditional surrender of your family’s constitutional rights and property addressed to J.B. Bilderberg, International Grandmaster of the Ancient and Sovereign Order of the Knights of the Tensor-Calculus.

Indeed.

-Mr. Bilderberg