Today can be described as winship. In an essence, I win and everyone else founders besides the ones who walk these blessed halls of iBankCoin. Most of you think the correct use of the word is “flounder” but you would be wrong, it is “founder.” Now, that gets me thinking. I read blog posts and want to throw up on myself. My expensive Kona coffee — which I buy myself as I dont drink sewer water from a Keurig, like the rest of my office — is splattered all over my monitor and desk numerous times a day at the lack of grammar and grasp of syntax that is propogated all over the internet. It is as if the whole idea of reading a book is anathema to you plebs. I implore you, pick up a book. For the love of God, increase your vocabulary. You are like children who have eaten their “hooked on phonics” books.

Enough of that, lets move to what matters; the almighty algorithm that is the US Markets. As I am a man of taste and respect, I give it when it is due. Le Fly helped me reattach my scrotum yesterday when I prepared to cut $UNXL for a loss. I was all in tears when he slapped me through the monitor and told me to man up and act like a Talmudic scholar. “Be a man of superior intelligence,” said He.

I will watch $UNXL  trade above $30 while you scream about some bullshit lawsuit from some bullshit firm. Lawsuits mean all of nothing. I made a nice 30% on $MHP this year when everyone said the government’s lawsuit would take down the ratings agencies. It is ignorance on a grand scale that allows me to bank coin in style, I thank you all for that.

I rebought $IMMR on the opening dip at $14 and proceeded to sell it at $15 a few hours later. Watch and learn.

Going into next week I am decently long with about 30% cash. I think we trade higher and retest highs, but honestly, I dont know shit. I am back in my favorite long, $RAD, after booking a sexy 15%+ gain inside 12631. And, because of @RaginCajun’s prowess, I was pointed in the direction of $RBCN and also took that down.

It is a three day weekend and I plan to enjoy it in style; cigars and bitches.

Peace.

This has been one intense two day period. Pikers everywhere were shredding confirmations on naked shorts, every single Japanese investor simultaneously castrated themselves overnight, and two savage englishmen cut the head off an English soldier in the middle of the day.  What has this god forsaken rock devloved into? I sometimes think that the market is just a microcosm of the fucked up shit that happens in the world. Pure fuckery. One day, the top-hatted men over at $JPM will unload the gold in their vault and use said material to fly off to space, leaving us behind to destroy ourselves.

Normally, I would be surfing the waves of margin calls and teaching right wingers the meaning of civic duty, which in this case is to stay far away from prescious metals. However, I have been stressed. Yesterday through me for a loop and I didnt seem to recover. As a lesson to you all, if you find yourself in a mental state that is not more intune then the crown, turn off the computer and punch an old man in a wheeled chair (see: The Fly).

I opened the day down like drunken buffoon who fell out of a tree and forgot how he got there. After the bearshitters realized the world was not imploding, i recovered some gains. Yet, it is still not good. The numbers I saw in my account yesterday were glorious, and of course, extremely short lived. I will not rehash the day from hell, but you get the point, it blew.  I unloaded some junk and kept some junk. My biggest trade was to dump $IMMR, it trades like shit and scares the shit out of me right now. I took +2% on a oversized position, fuck me.  I added to $MCP, and only God knows why. Other then that I will attempt to trade as little as possible till I take the weekend to recoup my sanity. Mind you my cash position is huge and still experiencing absurd volatility. Apparently, I didnt listen when Alpha was being discussed in class.

Chow bitches.

On a side note, I saw Andre Nickatina last night in NYC. That shit was straight gangsta. If you dont know him, one you suck, and two it Option Addict’s avatar.

Peace.

Now, I know the self-purported economic geniuses who troll this site all have strong opinions toward our wonderful Fuhrer, Ben Bernanke, and lo and behold I do too. In the name of John Maynard and other gangsta shit, I will repost an article that has recently made the rounds in the circles of the online economic elite.

These halls of iBankCoin are for true top-hatted gentlemen. In that vein, I expect the level of discourse to be somewhat intelligent (far-right fascists need make no inquiry here). So keep the nouveau riche comments to the boiler room.

http://tinyurl.com/ceg2x8b

As the saying goes, you made your bed now sleep in it. Well, fuck that.

However, there is some truth to it and such realities were felt by my person today as I commited a common and noobish mistake. I over traded. Simple, yet aggravating to no end.  From my perch, it begins with a nice uptrending market where I am properly positioned and riding the waves of debauchery and excess as I wrap Tea Partiers in confederate flags then proceed to ignite said flags.  It feels good, it feels great.  I watch my accounts soar to new heights and levels not previously seen.  As I take profits in well executed trades, my cash position rises. Said cash gets pissed that its not being put to work, so like the pushover I am I go out in search of the next “breakout” …More often than not, it is a trade I have not researched and have just “followed” a colleague into.  Sometimes I win with those, and sometimes I lose. But either way, no matter how I look at it, I overtraded.

Today being a microcosm of subpar trading in the casa del Harper, I overtraded a few times and saw my P&L drift ever lower.  Though I closed the day +2.3%, handily beating $SPY, I felt cheated. Not cheated by the menacing HFTs or the Bearded Clam or any other such omnipotent market participant, but by me. I was the designer and executor of my own pain today, a reality I must accept. 

As the saying goes, you made your bed now sleep in it.

When I arrive in my office every morning, even before the coffee and the proverbial “nail in the coffin,” I check the futures. Moreover, in a most masochistic fasion, I check the pre-market prices of stocks that I sold the night before or passed over. And damn, if I am not a glutton for pain. Today’s wonderful kick to the face is $SOL, which is sitting on a nice 15% gain. Those chinese bastards are extracting energy from the sun like a greek god, they will harness it, devalue their currency and attack the Japanese over some islands nobody goes to ..besides birds, who apparently find it a very comforting place to defecate.

Anger contained, I want to give credit where it is due and give a shout out to the wonderful gentlemen in 12631 as well as Le Fly for helping me bank coin in solars over the past 2 weeks. If you havent joined that chatroom yet, consider yourself a stalwart of the 99%, forever beholden to gentlemen in their Ivory Towers.

I walk into the day with a cash position near 35%. My top picks being $MT, $FRO, $CZR, $BBRY and $NES.

Stop trying to call a top.

Here it is, my attempt at the art of the blog. It will, hopefully, be the pinnacle of the knowledge I have thus acquired in my years.

It is my plan to rise above the derelicts on this street of Wall, and pen the ideas you wish you had thought of.  If I fail, so be it. If I succeed, then plebeians will pilfer my value-added ideas for themselves, all the while telling their friends the amazing performance of their 4-figure Fidelity account.

Perhaps, though, some will walk through the halls of iBankCoin, happen upon my page, and learn a thing or two. Though, you have be warned; my warped vision of politics and finance are insulting to many and understood by few. Do not despair. If you read long enough, enlightenment will follow.

Since this is about making money, I will let you onto my favorite trade of the day: I sold 1/3 of my massive $RAD position above $3 today from buys at $2.25, $2.50 and $2.53 (timestamped inside 12631, where you can find me trading daily).  I love this story and will be buying back on weakness. The stock is worth $5, but more on that later.

– Harper